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He Says He Just Wants to be Friends, Heres 15 Signs He's Lying

He Says He Just Wants to be Friends Relationship
July 27, 2023

When you find yourself in the company of a man who treats you like gold, it can be hard to tell if he wants more than friendship. He might make your heart flutter and give you butterflies in your stomach, but is he interested? 

It's not always easy to know when a man is just being friendly or wants more. The best way to tell is by his actions and words, but it can still be hard to read the signs.

It's a scenario that many women have experienced, and it can be one of the most confusing things about dating: You're hanging out with a guy you like – maybe even someone you've seen exclusively. Then he says he just wants to be friends.

Even though he says he just wants to be friends. Here are 15 common signs that he wants to be more than just friends.

1. He wants to spend time with you.

He's always asking you to hang out, and he makes an effort to keep seeing you.

If he just wanted to be friends, he wouldn't want to spend every waking moment with you. So instead, he might offer up an excuse like he's busy or tired when he can't see you.

He isn't just giving you attention because he feels obligated. If he likes you, he wants to be with you as much as possible.

2. He texts and calls often.

If he wants to be more than friends, it won't just be in person. He'll also want to text and talk on the phone as much as possible. If he cares about you and wants something more, he'll make an effort to keep in touch.

He's not checking up on you because he wants something from you; he's just maintaining the connection that he started by reaching out.

He texts you all the time, and he always answers your calls, even if he doesn't want to talk about something serious.

He says he's not ready for a relationship but still wants to see you or hear from you every day is a clear sign he wants the relationship to take the next level. 

3. Your friends think that he likes you too.

We can be caught up in the situation and sometimes misread feelings and actions. But when a friend tells you that he likes you and he's interested, it is a clear sign he wants something more.

Friends can see things you cannot because they are not as involved, and their judgment isn't clouded with feelings. This person can tell if they think he wants more or just to be friends by how he acts and how he treats you, which we cannot see from our own perspective.

4. He gets jealous when you speak to other guys.

He might not say he romantically loves you, but he can't stand the thought of another guy talking to you. If he wants to be just friends, he won't care if you talk with other guys or flirt back when they try to make a move on you.

If he gets restless or negative when you talk about or with other guys, it's a clear sign he has deeper feelings for you than just friends would have. He won't like the idea of you dating other guys.

5. He opens up about his personal life

He wants more than friendship if he trusts you enough to tell you his secrets and personal details. He might not be ready for a romantic relationship right now with you, but he is letting down some of the walls that he has in place.

A guy who just wants to be friends won't want to share details about his life, but he will if he's in it for more than that. He'll open up and give you insight into what he likes or dislikes or talk about personal struggles he's experiencing. It shows that he trusts you enough to let you in on this aspect of his life. 

6. There's flirty banter

Couple flirting with each other

If he's not interested in more than friendship, the flirting won't be there. But when he is attracted to you and wants something more, he'll tease you with an underlying sexual tone or flirtatious jokes that only couples share.

His sense of humor will change because he isn't just looking at this from a friendly perspective anymore.

7. His body language is open, relaxed, inviting, and nothing feels forced.

You can tell if his conversations are genuine and relaxed versus him feeling like he has to talk for fear of being rude or hurting your feelings. If it feels natural to talk to him, then there is mutual respect between both parties rather than one person putting more into the relationship than the other. 

He is very expressive. He goes out of his way to hold your hand or rub your back or shoulder anytime he hangs out with you. This might seem innocent since he doesn't want anything more than friendship, but there are reasons why this could be one of the most significant signs that he has feelings for you.

8. He surprises you with treats or gifts.

He can't get enough of you, he wants to spend more time with you, and he loves who he is when he's around you so much that he tries to surprise you with little things here and there just for the sake of making your day better or lifting your spirits. 

If it seems like he goes out of his way to make these friendly gestures, it's because he enjoys being in this friendship, and it's a significant indication he wants something more than just to be friends.

9. He gives you a lot of attention

It might not be in the form of compliments, he'll make an effort to include you in his plans, and he's interested in what you have to say. He wants to know more about who he is as a person by getting into your head and heart through conversation.

All these things can indicate that he likes you more than just being friends. He might not be ready for something more, but he doesn't want to lose you. So he'll try his best to make sure he stays friends with you while he figures out what he wants.

10. He's protective of you

When he likes you, he'll let his protective instinct kick in, and he will want to make sure no one hurts you or makes you feel bad about yourself. He doesn't like when other people insult you, and he will defend you since he has feelings for you that go beyond friendship.

If he becomes overly protective of you, he might be trying to make up for the fact that he has stronger feelings for you than he is letting on.

11. He compliments your appearance 

If he is attracted to you, he'll notice your physical features, and he's going to tell you how much he likes it, or he might not say anything at all, but he will stare a little too long. Either way, his attraction for you can be seen through how he interacts with your body language.

If these signs sound familiar, then there's probably something that has sparked between the two of you, whether it's now or in the future if things progress as such. Whether this is love, lust, or something else entirely - there are plenty of ways to determine what direction this relationship takes next!

12. He's comfortable introducing you to friends and family members

When he thinks you're the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with, he will want to introduce you as his girlfriend or future wife. He may not say those exact words, but he'll make it clear that your relationship is going somewhere, and everyone who matters needs to know how important this person is in his life.

13. You both spend time alone together

He never wants the two of you to be apart, he misses you when he's not with you, and he values your company. So he will take every opportunity he gets to see as much or more than possible so that he can have that time together without interruption from anyone else.

He will put in the effort to show you he wants this relationship with you. He'll make an extra effort to see more of you and spend time together so that it's clear how much he values your friendship or love for each other.

14. His eyes follow you when you are not looking

You catch him staring at you a lot when he thinks no one is looking. When he looks over at you during dinner, he smiles before he realizes he's caught. When you're not looking, he'll take a moment to appreciate the little things about your appearance.

He's trying his best to keep himself in check, or else everyone will know how much he likes you, and it might scare him if this is new territory for him.

15. He's affectionate

He might not be the type to kiss and tell, but he loves touching you when it feels right. For example, he'll put his hand on your lower back or brush past you during a conversation so that there is physical contact between the two of you.

He shows signs that his kiss means something if you both kiss.

Even if he doesn't say much about his feelings, this action reveals everything because it means a lot more than words ever could.

Why does he say he just wants to be friends?

Although his actions show that he wants more than friendship, it doesn't always explain why he won't just admit he wants more from the relationship.

It's not the right time in his life

Sometimes he can say he wants friendships, but other people's actions show a different focus on life he might not have figured out.

Maybe he has a lot of goals and does not want a real relationship distracting him. Or he's unsure about his future and can't commit until he's got a handle on his life.

He doesn't want to lose his friendship with you

He cares about you and doesn't want to lose your friendship or what he has with you. He might be trying to avoid hurting you both if everything goes wrong between the two of you.

When he has just experienced a breakup and is too scared to try the same thing again, this is his way of protecting himself. He doesn't want to go back there, so he keeps this you at arm's length even if it means keeping away from something that might be great for both of you.

He only wants to be friends with benefits.

A guy wanting only friends with benefits makes it clear they're never interested in any emotional connection at all. However, they will take more interest in the physical side of things and test the boundaries to see if you agree.

Watch out for plenty of flirting, touching, teasing with hardly any emotional connection, if any at all. He'll be highly physical and touchy-feely. He wants everything in return with no responsibility associated. His actions probably won't match his words.

How do I learn to read his behavior?

Please pay attention to the way he looks at you, where his eyes linger, and what messages he's trying to convey. Then, if it feels right, ask him if something is going on between you that could be more than just a friendship.

You can discuss his behavior and how he treats you with another male friend who will have a much different view of the relationship. Guys know other guys very well!

Final Thoughts

If you're having trouble reading his behavior, that might mean he wants something more complex with ambiguous boundaries.

He still needs time to figure out what he wants in life and how he feels about everything before making a real commitment to someone else.

Don't rush him into anything too soon because if it's not the right timing for either of you, it could turn out bad. Instead, be patient with him until he knows where your relationship should go or why things are happening between the both of you the way they are.

Be honest with yourself - do you feel like there could be potential here? What kind of relationship can lead to true happiness together? If yes, then don't give up.

If you want to know if a couple have been sleeping together checkout 13 signs they slept together.


3 comments on “He Says He Just Wants to be Friends, Heres 15 Signs He's Lying”

  1. Thank you that clears so much up only the guy didn’t say he wants to be just friends he actually didn’t much say anything about it but my friends are convinced that he likes me since when I was around him in person the day we met he talked to me then he sat down next to me and the entire time at the party he was never very far away almost like he thought another guy would talk to me like the article said he didn’t really touch me or anything but the one time I was around him the entire time I was around him I was sitting across from him at dinner he was looking t me the entire time he was making it pretty obvious too we were talking so that might have had something to do with it or he is attracted to me I get this gut feeling he might or he is just being an awesome friend either way it’s all good I don’t really hear much from him but that’s because he is busy with what he is doing and he lives kinda far too so that makes it kinda hard to see him all the time

  2. I Would like me and my girlfriend Kimberly to have a very good relationship me and her tend to argue a lot she would decide not to talk to me in a long time. I've known her for a very long time me and her are both the same age 48 years old. She has a hard time admitting her feelings for me I would like her to admit her feelings for me.

  3. I was with someone for about two months and we had the physical and emotional connection too. He said he’s not ready for a relationship and says he will only want to be friends even in the future. Yet when I’m with him his behavior displays different. Any thoughts? I did ask him and he said he doesn’t want anything other than friendship

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